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Where do I Begin?

It’s no breaking news that humanity is breaking in many ways.


In all our efforts to raise awareness for mental health, we don’t talk enough about how the two most commonly heard terms - anxiety and depression - are two states that are by default characterized by negative thinking.


Depression is a heavy blanket of deep hopelessness: “Things are terrible, and this is how they’re always going to be. I can’t do anything to change this situation.”

Anxiety says, “Something’s gonna go wrong” or “I’m too weak to handle what’s coming my way.”


When you start off on such a negative note, it’s extremely challenging to believe that any good change is possible. Even if you’re not struggling with chronic anxiety or depression, the mind tends to lean towards the negative, if we’re not careful to check our facts. We’re products of steady conditioning from all the thoughts we accumulate throughout the day. Gather, rinse, repeat. The messages around us often seem designed to provoke us into comparison and to stir up our insecurities.


What do you do when you’re constantly fighting off negative messaging and also dealing with the voices inside of you that pull you down into despair?


Easy is not the first word anyone could use to describe the journey towards healing. (More like messy. Or crazy!) So where do we begin? Taking even a single step forward may feel like walking with heavy weights tied to your legs, but that first step matters.


Whatever you do, don’t let the negativity convince you that it’s all over.


It’s not over until you decide it is.


I was inspired many years ago to start Pebbles from my Journey as an anonymous blog, where I could share my deep, dark secrets and struggles, where I could freely talk to the world about my mess without being judged. I wanted people to know they were not alone. Because that’s how I felt in the middle of my eight-year long battle with depression. Utterly hopeless and alone.


But today I do have a testimony to share. Not just of overcoming suicidal thoughts and depression and making it alive to see today, but of the nearness and constant love of God, how He stood by me through the craziness. I was a hopeless mess of bitterness and pain. It wasn’t easy to get through an ocean of poison to find the spring of living water. But I couldn’t give up as long as He didn’t give up on me. Though no one else could see any possibility for healing or goodness in me, He did. He persisted.


And that’s why I believe that my victories cannot stay silent. Neither can yours. We must share the hope we have for healing and wholeness. That God makes it possible for us in Christ, to be fully restored and redeemed.


I don’t claim that it’s a one-stop journey. It’s a process of daily renewal. But it just feels so worth it when you realise that God doesn’t wait for us to be perfect to love and celebrate us. He is our greatest champion. I can testify that He believed in me when nobody else did. So today, you might be dealing with the harshest mental battle, or the most complicated life situation. But if you can take that first step, however small, to say, “Yes! I believe there’s more. I know this isn’t the end. I know there is hope for healing. And I want to be whole!” - I know that you are not gonna undertake that journey alone. God fights for your healing. And we want to support you in that process.


Pocketful of Pebbles is a series of workshops designed to equip you with the tools to improve your mental and spiritual health. This time around in October, we invite you to these psychoeducational workshops which deal with a few building blocks of mental health:


  • How bad does it need to get before you reach out for help?

  • Can we identify distress signs that tell us our loved ones aren’t doing alright?

  • Do you find yourself putting up walls in an effort to protect yourself, but end up shutting people out?

  • Do you want to learn what it means to take care of your personal space and not let people abuse you?


We’ll address these and more during this month’s workshops. You can access more details and register for these online sessions here.



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